


Matter of the Heart

by the_duck_bride



Category: the GazettE
Genre: Comedy, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Mentioned Original Female Character, Oral Sex, POV First Person, Romance, Slice of Life, Smut, blowjob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-18
Updated: 2016-09-30
Packaged: 2018-08-09 14:03:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7804645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_duck_bride/pseuds/the_duck_bride
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I fell in love with you. Not for what you look like, but for who you are."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Your Voice of Velvet

**Author's Note:**

> BIG thanks to bishiebe (on LiveJournal) for being my key advisor on this fic~ ^_^ 
> 
> Thank you to bishiebe on LJ for beta-ing this chappie for me <3

  
It started out just like any other day. I had woken up and laid in bed for longer than I probably should have before my best friend, Yuu, who also doubled as my kind-of-caretaker, came in and informed me that I needed to "rise from my slumber", as the weirdo put it. I had a day to face. He'd then proceeded to smack a beat on my thighs over the duvet and announce that breakfast would be ready in twenty minutes and if I wasn't out of bed by then, he'd feed my portion to the dog. The raven practically pranced out of my room then; how he had a girlfriend I would never be able to fathom.  
  
Even though he was a massive pain in my arse sometimes, I was really glad I had Yuu in my life. Even on the days where I wasn't one hundred percent he would always be there to drag my sorry arse along to make sure I made it through the day, got to bed, and then woke up the next morning. He'd been my best friend since I had been in 7th grade, and Yuu had been in 8th grade, and we had been through a lot together. The first time I'd ever met him was when he'd pushed away a few bullies who'd been picking on me. I remember seeing a shadow appear in front of me, blocking out the three smaller ones before Yuu's voice rang out, telling them to scram or he'd go get a teacher. Back then that had been the ultimate threat.  
  
After that Yuu and I had stuck together closely. Well, more like he stuck to me. I think in the beginning he felt sorry for me, but once he realised I could do most of the things normal kids could do, he believed that he didn't have to be watching me every second of every day. He still stayed by my side though. Since then he had looked out for me when I needed it, all through middle school and high school, and once we graduated high school we had gotten an apartment together. Yuu had been everything for me for a long time.  
  
Finally I managed to drag my lazy arse out of bed and headed towards the bathroom, slipping into the shower to wake myself up a little more. After dressing in a pair of jeans and a shirt I moisturised my face just as Yuu called me for breakfast. I called back, making my way downstairs and stopping as Koron, my little Chihuahua jumped at my feet. "Hey, baby," I greeted him, bending down to pet him before wandering into the kitchen. "Smells good." I smiled to Yuu, sitting myself down at the table, my food being placed in front of me.  
  
Yuu and I got stuck into our meals, chatting on and off as we enjoyed our food. Yuu was a really amazing cook; which made sense since he was a chef. It was the most convenient career for him. It meant that he could be here most of the day with me before he went off to work in the evening. Plus he just genuinely enjoyed cooking. So it was a win-win situation.  
  
We were around halfway through the food when Yuu hummed before speaking. "I have a session with my new personal trainer today," he mentioned. I remembered him briefly telling me about it; something about wanting to be fitter so he could look better for his girlfriend, Mimiko. I hadn't asked for anymore details beyond that. "Want to come? He might be able to give you a few tips on your circulation. How's it been lately?"  
  
I shovelled a mouthful of scrambled egg into my mouth before looking up once more. "It's been...inconsistent," I said with a slight frown. Sometimes, because I didn't always do a lot of moving about, the circulation in my feet, ankles, hands and wrists got a little bad and it made them ache. I hadn't gone to the doctor about them yet, mainly because neither Yuu nor I could afford it. We were already being conservative with our money, despite the fact that I did get a little bit of a disability pension. "I guess it wouldn't hurt to go along, huh?" I asked, flashing Yuu a little smile as I continued eating. "Mm, after this will you help me put my contacts in?"  
  
"Of course. What colour will you go with today?" Yuu wondered as I heard the clink of his chopsticks being set down on his plate. I guessed he was finished already. I swear that man ate like he was a fucking bottomless pit. I wished I could eat like him and never gain weight.  
  
"I think I'll go with grey."  
  
Once we were done, I set about cleaning up the kitchen. I did the dishes while Yuu went off to change into his exercise gear and by the time he came back I was almost done. He helped me dry off the dishes and then we went upstairs while I sat in my chair as Yuu carefully slid my grey contact lenses into my eyes. The first time he'd done it I'd been terrified. But now he'd been doing it for over five years it was like second nature to him. Blinking a few times, I got the contacts sitting comfortably, before heading down the hallway once more. Yuu grabbed the car keys off the counter for us to get going. In the car, Yuu jabbered on about how excited he was for this personal trainer and how good he was going to look for "his Mimi" and how he was going to have the most amazing abs. Even as we got out of the car at the local park he was still going.  
  
"Yuu, you're a moron, shut up," I eventually chided him, though I chuckled a little at the huff I heard him let out.  
  
"You're so mean~" He sulked. But very soon he stopped, as did I, and I saw another body standing nearby. I assumed we'd come to the spot where he'd be seeing his trainer. I turned, spotting a bench not too far away.  
  
"I'll go take a seat. Have fun, I better hear you panting," I teased, patting Yuu on the back before I made my way over to the bench. I was left to my own devices and when that happened I usually just found myself thinking; about life, about my friends, about my future, my past. I kind of just tuned things out as I got lost in my own thoughts.  
  
I often wondered about what the future would be like, whether Yuu would one day marry Mimiko. They'd been dating for nine years now and they were always so happy. But then I would wonder what would happen to me. Obviously I was well aware that the world did not revolve around me, but I kind of needed Yuu. He was my part time caretaker. Sure, I didn't pay him; he did it out of the kindness of his heart, but surely he knew that I needed him. I didn't want to have to find someone else. I was sure that the only reason Mimiko and Yuu weren't living together already was because of me and it made me feel a little bad to be honest, I felt like I was holding Yuu back.  
  
My next port of call was my non-existent love life. I spent probably more time than I should contemplating the fact that I had never had a proper boyfriend; I wasn't a virgin anymore, but I had only ever had sex about twice and with people who weren't special to me. In a way I regretted not waiting, but being a twenty-three year old virgin would be sad. Sometimes I wondered if anyone would actually like me ever, or if people felt apprehensive about dating me because they thought they'd just become another givercarer for me. I think people failed to realise that I was still perfectly functional without anyone around; it was just easier for me to have someone there.  
  
I hadn't realised how deep in my own thoughts I had really been until I felt a gentle touch on my shoulder. I jumped slightly, though I recognised the touch as Yuu's. I could hear that he was slightly out of breath and I turned my head in his direction, turning it back a moment later when another shadow fell over me. "This is my friend I told you about," Yuu announced and I figured he must have been talking to his personal trainer. Standing up so as not to seem impolite, I smiled and bowed.  
  
"You must be Takanori."  
  
His voice...  
  
"My name's Akira, I'd be more than happy to help you out. I can give you a few simple exercises to do that'll help boost your circulation."  
  
It was so...I didn't even know how to describe it. I think I nearly had a brain aneurysm. His voice - Akira's voice - it was like nothing I had ever heard before. It wasn't even something I could really explain; it was like it was seeping into my skin and I felt goosebumps rising on my arms. Actual goosebumps. Maybe I was crazy, but his voice was something crafted in my ideal heaven. If it were a tangible object I was sure it would be the most luxurious piece of velvet. I wished I could hold it and keep it with me forever.  
  
I was snapped out of my trance when Yuu nudged me gently. I shook my head a little blinking a few times. "Sorry," I apologised. "It's nice to meet you, Akira. Uh, how much will I owe you?"  
  
"Oh, there's no need to pay." Fuck, I wanted him to keep talking. I didn't even care what he said as long as words kept flowing from his mouth and coated my entire body in that deep velvety softness. "It won't take very long to show you."  
  
I blinked a few more times, this time in a little shock though. He didn't want me to pay him? "...If you're sure."  
  
"Of course, it's not a problem." I heard a smile in his voice and it made me smile as well. "I have another client coming soon, so unfortunately I can't show you today. But if you like, I can meet you this Friday afternoon?"  
  
Keep talking, Akira.  
  
"Yes, Friday's fine for me." I looked at Yuu for confirmation and he nodded; an indication that it was fine for him to take me.  
  
"Fantastic. Where suits you best? I'm happy to travel to your place if it's more convenient or you can come into the gym."  
  
Don't ever stop talking.  
  
"Actually, if you wouldn't mind, my place would probably be best." That probably seemed a little forward of me, but it was just business. And it also meant that Yuu wouldn't have to drive me anywhere, which was good news for him.  
  
"Fantastic." There was that smile again, I could hear it. "I look forward to it, Takanori. Good session today, Yuu. I'll see you guys later."  
  
As soon as Akira had walked away it was like a veil had been lifted. I just stood in place for a few moments, trying to just ground myself a little. Had that really just happened? Had I seriously just had a religious fucking experience, totally mesmerized by someone's voice like that?  
  
"Hey, earth to Taka." Yuu's voice drifted into my ears and I snapped out of it instantly, shaking my head and turning to face him. I could hear the smirk in Yuu's voice and it made me want to punch him in the arm. "I think you'd find him cute. Want me to tell you what he looks like?"  
  
I stared off in the direction Akira had left in and smiled a little, shaking my head. "No." I didn't need to know what he looked like. His voice was beautiful, his presence enchanting. I felt like I'd been put under some kind of spell.  
  
"Alright then, lover boy. Let's get home, Mimiko's coming over for lunch and she'll want to hear all about your new crush."  
  
That time I really did punch him.


	2. Your Scent of Seduction

"So, are you excited for your date?" Yuu asked, the hint of a teasing tone in his voice - the bastard - as he stood by my chair, sliding my first contact into my eye. I'd chosen to go with pale green that day, which was probably one of my favourite colours. I guess I hadn't really realised until then that I'd sort of dressed up for the occasion. Not a lot, but enough that it was more dressed up than what I'd normally be if I were just hanging around my house.

"Shut up, Yuu," I grunted, tilting my head back for him to put my second contact in. "It's not a date. He's coming to show me some exercises."

Yuu hummed, stepping back once both of my contact lenses were in. "Yeah, but you think he's a babe, don't you? So it's a date from your side of thinking." Yuu nudged my side and I huffed, giving him a little shove as I got up off my bed.

"I can't see the man's face, I don't know if he's a ‘babe’ or not," I accused, moving over to pick up my brush and start running it through my shoulder length hair, untangling it from the hours of tossing and turning in bed.

"Well, you would know what he looked like if you let me tell you," my best friend pointed out with a little sigh and I heard him plop onto my bed behind me, clearly watching me work.

"Yeah, but I already told you before; I don't want you to tell me what he looks like. I couldn't care less because it doesn't matter anyway," I sighed. Sometimes talking or thinking about the topic got me a little down. It sucked to think about it, really. "Yuu, I've never seen your face but you're still my best friend. Appearances don't matter to someone like me." I shrugged my shoulders, setting my brush back down.

I heard shuffling behind me and then Yuu was there, his arms sliding around my shoulders as he gave me a warm hug. "I know, Taka...I'm sorry." He knew, of course, that I didn't love talking about this kind of thing. "Me and my big fucking mouth, huh?"

I scoffed, hugging him back and shaking my head. "Yeah, if you weren't so straight you'd be the best cocksucker," I nudged him playfully, chuckling along with him. I was always so glad that Yuu had enough of a sense of humour to laugh with me making gay jokes at his expense. He didn't really have that frail masculine pride that so many men did and it was really something that I loved about him. I didn't have to worry about tiptoeing around him for fear that he might feel his manliness was being threatened. Yuu was just so comfortable with himself that he didn't need to worry about that kind of shit. I admired him a lot.

With a fond little smile, I took a step back from my best friend just as the doorbell rang. "I suppose that's him," I mused, feeling a small wave of nerves come over me as I thought about the prospect of his man, whose voice had captivated me, coming into my home and seeing where I lived. Not that I was ashamed at all of how I lived. It was just the idea of it that was a little scary or me.

Passing Yuu, I walked through the apartment to the front door. I could hear Yuu follow me but I didn't bother to look at him, I had my eyes focused on the door and was trying not to lose my shit. But I just kept repeating it over and over in my head, 'Calm the fuck down, Takanori. What's ever gotten into you? You've only been in the same vicinity with this guy once!' After another breath, I pulled open the door, finding Akira there and I smiled. "Hey, come on in." I stepped aside, letting Yuu's personal trainer in.

"Hey, Akira," Yuu greeted, probably shaking his hand, as I went to close the front door. "Oh, don't worry Taka. I'm heading off to see Mimiko."

My head snapped around and I glared at him as if to say 'You're fucking what?!' Yuu just held his hands up in the air in what I figure was a gesture of surrender. My buddy was leaving me! He was abandoning me when he knew I needed him. What if I did something stupid and made a fucking fool out of myself in front of this guy?! "Sorry man, gotta keep my lady happy." Yuu patted my shoulder as he walked past me and all I could really do was stand there rather frozen as the door closed behind my best friends retreating figure.

"So." Akira's velvet voice broke through into my thoughts and I think I nearly fucking fainted. His voice was just as gorgeous as I remembered it to be. "Should we get started? Where should I set up?"

It wasn't long after that that Akira had set up his little makeshift gym in mine and Yuu's living room. There was a yoga mat on the floor as well as a few small weights I think, and I'd hoped he'd realised that I wasn't a very muscley person. Regardless, I did as he instructed me to do, not able to make much conversation because I was focusing pretty intensely on not falling over as we did a few warm up balance exercises.

Once those were done, and I'd managed not to make a fool of myself yet, I was instructed to get onto the yoga mat where Akira proceeded to instruct me on a few yoga moves. I could kind of see what he was doing and I tried to replicate what he was showing me but it was getting a little difficult. With a small sigh, I stood up and face him, pursing my lips slightly. "Akira, I'm not really getting these moves. It's a weird question, but do you think you could maybe...put my limbs where they're meant to go?" I needed him to actually put his hands on me and direct me otherwise I knew that I was never going to get it.

A little reluctantly, I think, Akira accepted and came to stand next to me. He took my hand, I shivered slightly at the contact, and he started to move my fingers for me. "Like this," he said, his voice pretty close to my ear. He kept hold of my hand before placing his hand under my upper arm to lift it up. This action must have caused him to take a step in to stand closer because all at once I got a whiff of him and I think my knees went a little bit weak. He smelled...a little like sandalwood; it was that earthy undertone, slightly rustic. He also smelled slightly like citrus for some reason and there was something else in there that I could only attribute as his natural scent. Something purely Akira.

The more I smelled it the more I wanted to wrap myself in it. I wanted to curl into a blanket infused with Akira's voice and his scent. That would just be heaven. Perhaps people might think I was a creep for thinking things like that. But I was merely indulging in the senses that I had, making the most of them. Soaking up everything that was around me and at that moment in time, it was Akira

"...kanori." Words seeped into my brain once more and I shook my head slightly, making a pretty dumb noise. Beside me, Akira chuckled. "I asked if you heard me?"

"Uh...no, sorry. I must have spaced out," I answered dumbly, wanting to smack my head against a wall instantly.

"I told you that if you move your hands like this while you flex your arm it'll encourage blood flow. Especially if you do this while your fingers are hurting, you'll find out that it helps immensely." He gently let my arm fall back to my side and it felt like he lingered for a moment. I just kept my face turned towards him, wanting to soak in that intoxicating smell for as long as I could. I swear, Akira was ticking all of my boxes thus far.

Pretty soon he announced that that was about it for him; that he should start getting ready to go. I smiled, nodding to him as I picked up a few of his things, helping him pack up his gym bag as best I could. I assumed he had a specific spot where things went in his bag, so I just handed things to him.

It was five minutes later when I was walking him towards the door and I stopped once we got there. "Thank you so much for today Akira, I really, really appreciate it." Regardless of my little space out I knew that my circulation would start to improve. He'd taught me a lot of useful little exercises to help boost my blood flow. "Are you sure I don't owe you anything? I feel bad not paying you."

I heard Akira chuckle and it had to be one of the most magical sounds I'd ever heard. "Well...if you really want to pay me, I'm sorry if this is too forward. But I'd like to take you out to dinner. You can think of it as payment for today?" I could hardly believe my ears when Akira actually asked me out...he asked me on a date!

"Wait...how do you even know I'm gay?" I gawked.

"I'm not sure, really. I could just kind of tell."

"Well, fuck me," I muttered, rather astonished that he'd known. I mean, sure sometimes I gave off a gay vibe, but not when all we were doing was exercise. "But wait, so that means that you're gay as well. Or at least, not straight, right?" Seriously?!

Akira chuckled again and I think he rubbed the back of his head a little sheepishly. "Uh yeah, I'm gay." That definitely came as news to me. "So...what do you say?"

"Yes," I answered, probably a little quickly. But I couldn't really help it. This velvet voiced, seduction scented man had just asked me to have dinner with him. Holy shit, I couldn't wait to tell Yuu.

Akira and I swapped mobile numbers and I told him to call me when he had some free time. I made it pretty clear that I needed him to call me, which he seemed fine with. After swapping a few pleasantries, Akira leaned in and sweetly, and a little awkwardly, kissed my cheek at which point I got to breath in his scent once more and it was just as enchanting as the first time. I could only stare dreamily at the door as he left, staying there for a good five or ten minutes before I walked over to the couch in a bit of a daze, plopping down.

I had a date. A real live date, and with Akira of all people! Holy crap!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here is the second Chapter as promised ^^ I uploaded this on my phone (so apologies for any fuck-ups) because I forgot to bring my laptop to my girlfriend's place and the beta-d file just happened to still be in my emails ~phew~ 
> 
> But here is the second chapter a week later as promised~~ I hope you all enjoy it ^_^ And it gets more interesting soon (hopefully)
> 
> Comments are love ♡


	3. Your Taste, How it Turns Me On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my lovely beta, KaiButsu13 <3

"For the millionth time, Takanori, you...look...fine," Yuu huffed as he finished putting in my second blue contact. The bastard flicked my nose as he walked past me and wandered into the living room, clearly done with my bullshit.   
  
Groaning, I walked after him, smoothing my hands down over my shirt as I went. "Yuu, seriously. I can hardly tell what you've dressed me in. I let you pick this outfit so I better fucking look like a god." I folded my arms over my chest and leaned against the doorframe as Yuu went and plopped his arse down on the couch.   
  
"Taka, I picked that outfit. Of course you look like a god," my best friend scoffed as the TV flicked on.   
  
On slightly shaky legs I made my way to the couch and sat down as well. "Oh my god, Yuu." Sitting back, I leaned my head against the backrest and let out a long, drawn out breath; which I was pretty sure Yuu cringed at. "I think I'm gonna pass out. Seriously. What if he thinks I'm a total fucking weirdo? Or what if he finds out about...y'know and he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore? Or-"  
  
"Takanori Matsumoto," Yuu snapped, sat up and smacked my thigh. I opened my mouth to snap back but he cut me off. "Shut the fuck up, already. Ok? Why would he have asked you on a date if he thought you were a weirdo? And besides, if he finds out and doesn't want to know you anymore then that's just his loss, isn't it? It also means he's a prick and he doesn't deserve you." Yuu sighed quietly and patted my knee a lot more gently this time. "Just relax, alright? Everything will be fine."   
  
* * *  
  
Everything was not fine. At least, not on our first date. Akira had shown up at the door and from the moment I stepped out of mine and Yuu's apartment I was a bumbling, fumbling fucking mess! I couldn't talk properly; I kept jumbling up my words and fucking up my sentences. I may as well have been talking like fucking Yoda! Except...not as cool. On more than one occasion I forgot what the point of my statement was when I was in the middle of saying it. I dropped my chopsticks on the floor at the restaurant and then bumped my head on the table on the way back up. I almost fell over walking out the door and Akira had to catch me, like those cheesy moments in stupid romantic comedies. Except I wasn't really romantic comedy material. But we'll push that aside for now.   
  
Despite all of that Akira still asked me out on a second date. And a third and a fourth before he finally invited me over to his place to hang out and order in some Chinese food. It was nice and I really, really liked him. He was everything any guy could ever want. I was sure he knew about my little issue, but he never said anything about it, never asked, never treated me different. He was funny, he was kind, he was sweet, he had a little air of cheekiness about him that I really loved.   
  
When we were at his place for what would technically be our fifth date he finally brought up the subject that had probably been bugging him since the moment we'd met. "Hey, Taka." He'd taken to giving me that nickname. Normally I wouldn't let anyone but Yuu call me that, but I liked it when Akira did it as well...it made me feel fuzzy and all that romantic bullshit.   
  
"Yeah?"   
  
"Can I ask you something?" He leaned back into the couch and draped his arm over the back of it, his hand coming to rest against my shoulder, his thigh touching mine.   
  
I smiled and looked up at him through my grey-blue contact lenses. "You want to know about my eyes."   
  
I saw him nod.   
  
The smile lingered on my face as I shrugged, leaning into his side a little more. The more time we spent together the more comfortable I was being close to him and touching him. I liked his touch. His skin was soft and warm against mine and it was almost like I could feel his pulse. Sometimes when I hugged him I thought I could hear his heart beating in tandem with my own. I especially liked it when he tucked my hair behind my ear and his fingers would brush my cheek. It made me smile like I hadn't in a long time.   
  
"Well, there's not much to tell, really," I said with a little shrug. It wasn't like I really had a problem talking about it. But then I hadn't really talked to a lot of people about it other than Yuu. And I knew I could trust him. I'd kind of given up on explaining it to people, it just got too tiring in the end. "I was born like this."   
  
"So you've never..."   
  
"Yeah," I nodded, confirming it for him. "I only see shapes and colours. I'm not totally blind. I know the TV is over there," I pointed. "And there's the coffee table with your beer can, it's gold. Over there, there's a clock on the wall...about the size of a dinner plate."   
  
I heard Akira hum. I felt his arm slowly drop down from the couch and onto my shoulders, his fingers rubbing my arm in a comforting manner. Not that I really needed comforting, but I guess he knew that I didn't talk about it often.   
  
"But...I've never seen what's really on the TV, or the logo on the beer can, or the hands on the clock. I've never seen my parent’s faces, or Yuu's. I don't know what you look like. Hell, I've never even seen my own face. I have no idea what I look like. Except for my body shape and the colour of my hair." By the end I was speaking in a mere whisper. "It's hard sometimes...But I've learnt to cope. And it doesn't bother me so much these day."   
  
"Has it hindered your dating experiences?" Akira wondered and I felt him rest his other hand against my knee where it sat, curled slightly on his lap.  
  
"Of course it has." I swallowed thickly. Now that topic...that was one that I never spoke about. Yuu didn't bring it up. "Who the hell wants to date a blind guy?" I asked, smiling bitterly and feeling a small amount of venom slipping into my voice. I shook my head and his thumb rubbed my knee. "Sorry."   
  
"No, don't be sorry. For what it's worth...it doesn't make me think different of you," he said and I heard the empathy in his voice as he moved his head and his voice caressed my ear, his breath making me shiver slightly. "And for the record. You're beautiful."   
  
My breath hitched slightly as I felt his lips touch the shell of my ear. I pulled back from him slightly, but not too fast. I didn't want him to think that I was alarmed by his touch or grossed out by it or something. On the contrary, I quite enjoyed it. Slowly, I lifted my hands and held them just a little ways away from his face. "May I?" I asked softly.   
  
"Of course." Akira seemed to understand what I wanted and I felt his soft fingers guide my hands to his cheeks, placing them there and pressing them down just a little.   
  
I smiled as I rubbed my thumbs over his cheeks, up to his closed eyes, then down along his jaw, his chin. I ran one of them across his bottom lip, my smile growing slightly. "You have nice lips," I mused, absently running my thumb back and forth along it. My heart skipped a beat when I felt them move and they pressed a little more firmly against my thumb as he kissed it.  
  
I felt him shifting, saw his body moving a little closer to mine and then he started to close in. It wasn't until the last minute that I moved my thumb away from his lip and closed my eyes as his lips slowly melded over my own. And God, it was good. They were so soft and tender and they fit so unbelievably well against my own. I could feel myself melting against his touch, especially when he slid his hand over my cheek, cupping it tenderly as his other hand came to rest on my hip.   
  
Sighing, I relaxed more into the kiss and started to respond, rubbing my lips back against his and I looped my arms around his neck, pressing my chest forwards against his. I felt his low hum as the hand on my hip moved up to my waist and he pulled me closer. I was sure that it was the best kiss I’d ever received in my entire life. It may sound odd...but Akira tasted amazing. As his tongue slowly ran along my bottom lip I snuck my own out to meet it and I smiled a little against his lips as I heard him groan.   
  
His taste was almost like the way he smelled...was translated into a taste. It was more appealing than it sounded! Though it wasn’t really anything I could describe. He just tasted...like Akira, with a little hint of Chinese food in the background. But it was nice, no matter how weird it sounded. Which was why I shifted myself impossibly close, threading my fingers into his hair as I felt his fingers start to make their way beneath my shirt.   
  
The slightly calloused skin of his fingertips brushed my waist and I inhaled through my nose slightly as our kiss became more intense. Goosebumps rippled over my body and my hands in his hair tightened slightly causing him to groan against my lips. “Sorry,” I muttered. He shook his head with a little chuckle, indicating to me that it was ok.  
  
The more we kissed and the longer his hands spent roaming beneath my shirt the more and more turned on I found myself becoming until my cock gave a hefty throb inside my jeans, which made me moan. Akira pulled away at that, resting his forehead against mine. Briefly, I wondered if he was as turned on as I was, but I was very quickly distracted by his hand, which slid up my thigh and his fingers brushed the bulge in my jeans. I bit my lip, bringing my eyes up to look at his face, seeing just the fuzzy outline of his features, and I could tell then, he was just as turned on as me. I just wished more than anything that I might be able to see the look on his face.   
  
Without needing to really say anything, I nodded my head slowly, indicating that it was ok...he could keep going. My eyes fluttered slightly as his hand lay over my crotch, massaging it slowly, making me moan and whither in his grip slightly. It had definitely been a while since I’d done anything like this, and never with someone that I liked as much as I did with Akira. I could feel my face reddening as I leaned forward and pressed it into his neck, giving the warm skin a few kisses to assure him that I was ok.  
  
“You’re so cute,” he chuckled, his fingers starting to unbutton my jeans and slide the fly down. “The cutest.” He slid his hand into my jeans, past my underwear to touch the bare skin of my aching arousal.   
  
“Akira,” I gasped quietly, giving his arm a little smack. “You can’t say that shit when you’ve got your hands down my pants.” Despite trying to be serious I chuckled nonetheless and then I guess he knew he’d gotten away with it.   
  
I shut my eyes as his long fingers curled around my cock, stroking it slowly and I moaned, pushing my hips up into his hand slightly as my own fingers curled into his shirt. “Hey...You’re not a...” He trailed off, pulling back to look at me as I opened my eyes as well and I could see the blurry outline of his face quite close to mine. “...Because it’s ok if you are!”  
  
I paused, blinking a few times before I burst out laughing. “Oh, Aki. I’m not a virgin,” I told him, pecking his lips a few times. “God, I’m not that sad.” I looped my arm around his neck once more and pulled him back into me, though I couldn’t help but still grin between each kiss.  
  
That was...until his hand started it’s massaging again and the smiles and giggles quickly disappeared to be replaced by moans. He lowered his head, kissing down my jaw, my neck, to my collarbone which was exposed by the v-neck shirt Yuu had picked for me. He spent a little while there, kissing my neck and stroking my erection until it was pretty much driving me insane and I decided that I was ready to come.   
  
Akira seemed to understand without even being told, because he moved away from me and kneeled between my thighs after having slid onto the floor before me. “Oh my god...” I breathed as he instructed me to lift my hips a little and the next moment I felt the material of my jeans being pulled down a little more, leaving my bare cock out in the open. But it wasn’t bare for long, because after a few moments of fluttering kisses over my hips and my thighs, Akira’s mouth was there and it was the most amazing thing in the world.   
  
I arched a little against the couch, my hands fumbling slightly until they came into contact with his hair and I threaded the soft strands between my fingers as I practically crumbled beneath him. Never had a blowjob been so good before, and I assumed that that had something to do with the fact that it was Akira who was orchestrating everything down there. Every time his lips passed over my hard flesh a new wave of pleasure rolled through me and it had my nerves dancing.   
  
I let out a soft cry as his tongue pressed against the slit of my cock and I shivered. Sucking my length back into his mouth, I was shocked when I found that the tip of his nose touched the skin of my pelvis. Because...fuck, Akira was deepthroating me! No one had ever done that before, not that I’d received an amazing amount of blowjobs in my life. But still. I moaned loudly as his tongue wiggled along my cock and my fingers tightened in his hair slightly.   
  
“Oh god...I...”   
  
Akira seemed to know what I was going to say, because he only sucked harder, bobbing his head just a little faster and eventually it was just too much for me to handle. With a small cry, my back arched and I was coming against his tongue. And, to my great surprise, I could feel him swallowing around me. No one had ever swallowed for me before.   
  
Soon I was left panting against the couch as Akira crawled back up onto it and I surely knew that he was grinning, there was no way he couldn’t be. “Mm, that was amazing. You’re amazing,” I said to him as he leaned down and kissed me. Now he tasted like Akira and my come...which was a better combination than Akira and Chinese food, that was for sure.   
  
Akira smiled against my lips before he pulled away slightly. “I realize you probably can’t tonight...but next time, will you stay the night?” He asked, tucking my hair behind my ear which I loved so much.  
  
I smiled and nodded my head. “Of course. Now…” I smirked slightly as I slid my hand down to rub over his own erection. “Let me help you with that…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so long to get posted! Dx I've been working a crazy amount lately coz I'm going to Japan in 2 months and have no spending money yet!! And between that plus uni I've been hella busy. 
> 
> But thank you to everyone who has read and commented so far, I really appreciate it and even if I didn't reply to your comment I promise I saw it and I appreciate it so much x3 
> 
> Enjoy this chapter, guys ^3^


	4. Your Touch, How Tender

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my beta, KaiButsu13.

Akira and I continued seeing each other after that, and it only got better and better as  time went on. Every time I saw him I liked him more and more, because he was just so damn perfect. Yes, he had his flaws, but they were part of what made him so perfectly imperfect. Yuu constantly told me that my musing made me sound like a fool in love. But, of course, he supported mine and Akira’s relationship; he was happy for us.  
  
I was pretty damn happy for us as well!   
  
Around three months in we finally decided that we would make it official. We were already pretty much official, but it was nice to have clarity and finality about it. Where I could be absolutely sure that he was my boyfriend and I could call him that. Because there had been a little while there where we’d kind of been in that grey area, the one where you’ve been seeing someone for long enough that it could be a relationship and you’re definitely not seeing anyone else. But neither of you have spoken about the ‘b’ word, and you weren’t sure if you could call them your boyfriend yet. Yeah, we had that stage. But it didn’t last very long.   
  
Neither Akira nor myself were in much of a hurry. We both kind of silently agreed that we wanted to take this slow, we wanted this to be something that would work, that we knew wasn’t going too fast. And that was also nice. Akira and I seemed to have a silent understanding of one another, there were just some things that we didn’t need to talk about. We just…knew. It certainly made life a little easier for the both of us. Though, even though we had that connection, neither of us ever really ran out of stuff to talk about.   
  
Most weekends I found myself over at Akira’s place. We had movie marathons, junk food nights, one time we even took a bubble bath together and ended up splashing about and acting like fools. That was, until Akira got soap in his eye, then it wasn’t so fun. But he laughed it off anyway.   
  
The first time I’d stayed over the night was a little scary. Because I’d had to ask him to help me take my contact lenses out. And that was something only Yuu had ever done. It made me nervous to think that I had to get someone else to do it. I’d tried to get them out myself, but it was easier said than done! So in the end, I’d needed to ask Akira. But he hadn’t made a big fuss about it. He’d merely sat me down on the bed and been very careful about removing them, he put them in their little case and filled it up with the solution that they had to soak in.   
  
Initially, I had been nervous about letting him see my eyes without the contacts in, since they were what anyone would expect them to look like; cloudy and dull. At least that’s what I’d been told they looked like. Because, once again, only Yuu and my doctor ever really got to see me like that. But Akira, as understanding as ever, had assured me that it wouldn’t change the way he thought of me. That I would still be just as beautiful and when he’d seen me without my contacts for the first time he only shook his head and smiled, kissing my closed eyelids one after the other. He was far too sweet for me!   
  
Some time, probably six months after we’d begun dating, Akira and I were just lounging in his bed after having taken a nice warm bath together, minus the splashing and bubbles, when I propped my head up on his chest to look at him. “Hey, Aki. Have you  been with many people? Like…boyfriend-wise?”  
  
Akira was quiet for a little while and I could just tell that I had touched on a subject that maybe he found a little uncomfortable. But I didn’t withdraw my question. We were both so open with each other, I knew that he might need a second to think about how to answer. So I just rubbed my fingers over his bicep gently.   
  
“No,” he eventually answered, his voice sounding a little tight. “No, I haven’t really had many boyfriends before.”   
  
“Mm…?” I knew there was more.  
  
I heard him sigh and he leaned down to press his lips to my forehead. I couldn’t help but smile slightly, leaning my cheek against his shoulder. I loved it when he did small affectionate things like that. He was a real romantic softie at heart. “Well,” he started with another small sigh. “I guess, by regular standards, I’m an attractive guy though I really hate saying that about myself. I have nice features, a nice body…” The body part I could vouch for; though I had never seen it, I had felt it. And damn, he had some nicely toned, but not too defined, abs. His arms were pretty much the same, he had strong shoulders; the lot. “I guess I’m what most would call one of ‘the beautiful people’,” he huffed bitterly.   
  
Right then I probably would have made a joke about him being some kind of self-centered prick. But I could tell this was a serious topic for him, and so it wasn’t really the time for those kinds of jokes. If it had been in another situation I definitely would have poked a bit of fun at him, but not now. Instead, I just kept massaging his arm, humming quietly to assure him that I was listening.   
  
“And so, in the past, I’ve had a lot of people only want me because of my looks or my body,” he explained, hand sliding down to rub my back smoothly. “A trophy of sorts, I suppose. They’d stick around until they just got sick of me, or someone else came along. Someone better.” I felt Akira shrug and I sighed a little, turning my head to gently kiss his chest. “So I kind of gave up on dating people and trying to be in relationships. Since all anyone’s ever been interested in is my looks.”  
  
I raised an eyebrow and lifted my head a little. “So that’s why you’re with the blind guy…”  
  
“What?” I could hear the frown in Akira’s voice as he propped himself up a little in alarm. “No, Taka. That’s not it at all. You’re different, baby. I could tell right from the start that you were genuine. That’s why I took a chance on you. I-”  
  
“Relax, Aki,” I chuckled, patting his chest. “I was just kidding.” I felt him relax and I shook my head slightly, laying back down with him. “It’s just a nice coincidence that I can’t see what you look like. Don’t worry, I’m the least likely person in the world to want you for your appearance.” I smiled reassuringly as I propped myself up on my elbow, leaning down to peck his lips. Though, I missed and got his chin instead, which made both of us laugh. “Downside of being blind,” I mumbled. “I miss sometimes.” I shifted up a little more and got his lips this time.   
  
“But really,” I pulled back after delivering a few short, sweet peck to his lips. “You never need to worry about that. Because to me, it’s all a matter of the heart.”  
  
I felt Akira’s arms wrap around me, one of his hands coming up to cradle the back of my neck as he brought me down for a slightly more hungry kiss. “You’re so damn perfect,” he murmured against my lips before he kissed them once again. I could feel the truth in his words. I guess, to him, I was just as perfect as he was to me. But it was nice to know that he thought that.   
  
I sighed softly against his mouth as I pressed against him a little more, one of my hands coming up to cup his jaw as I passed my tongue over his bottom lip, eliciting a little growl from him as he hungrily slid his tongue into my mouth. In a split second he had rolled us over and trapped me beneath his sturdy frame, making me gasp and chuckle in surprise. I secretly liked how strong he was. It was nice; the idea that he could pick me up and throw me around if he really wanted to. Our size difference was something I found endearing about us.  
  
He rubbed his lips against my own for a while, his body resting down against me and I could feel every single hard line of his figure and it was just so wonderful. I really loved his touch. Because I couldn’t see him properly, I had to rely on all of my other senses to make up for that. And his touch was definitely one of my favourite things. His skin was always so warm and soft. I absolutely adored the way his large hands slid down over my back, fingers gliding over my skin. I loved the way he would sometimes hold my hand, put his hand on the small of my back, on my thigh, brush through my hair, my cheek. He was one of the most gentle people I had ever met.   
  
I mewled slightly as he pulled away from our kiss, attempting to follow his lips, but he pushed me back down. After a few moments I opened my eyes and looked up at him, not that I could see much. But it was still nice to be able to look up and feel his presence there. And I could still see the fuzzy outline of his features, so it wasn’t like I couldn’t see anything at all.   
  
Biting my lip, I watched as he sat up to withdraw his shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing it to the side before he leaned back over me. I smiled, a little bit sadly, as I reached out and ran my fingertips over his abs. Akira had often told me how much he loved how tactile I was. To which I could only reply that I had to be. In a way my hands were kind of like my eyes; they gave me a way of seeing things without seeing anything. But that didn’t stop me from wanting. I tilted my head to the side as his lips descended on my neck and I sighed, moaning quietly. “I wish I could see you right now,” I mused. My fingers still touched his abdomen before roaming upwards, brushing over his hardened nipples which caused his own small moan.   
  
Akira only hummed in my ear. I knew there wasn’t much he could say to me when I said things like that. Sometimes I felt bad for mentioning it, but he’d once told me to never hold back on expressing my desires. So I didn’t.   
  
But we fell silent once more as items of clothing became more and more scarce. First he rid me of my shirt, pausing at my sweat pants in favour of leaning over my chest to lavish it with attention and I arched as he took one of my nipples between his lips. He sucked and nibbled and gently pulled on the bud, causing butterflies to spread through my tummy. “Nnh…Aki..” I moaned when he rapidly flicked the tip of his tongue against my nipple, making my back arch towards him.  
  
One thing I had noticed about him but never really drawn attention to was how well he seemed to know how to pleasure someone. It wasn’t something I felt really needed to be talked about, but I’d definitely noticed. Akira was very skilled at working out what made me squirm.   
  
His fingers began working on my sweatpants as his mouth moved to my other nipple, but I was quick to lift my hand, toying with the forgotten one as he paid the other the same attention. My sweatpants also played a disappearing act, being removed from my body almost without me even noticing. But I had a vague recollection of lifting my hips for Akira to throw them away.   
  
Akira’s fingers curled around my cock and I moaned, hips twitching up against his hand as he stroked firmly. His mouth had moved away from my nipple, kissing over my torso and down my belly. He nibbled and sucked on random bits of my skin, no doubt leaving small hickies in a few places. Which I was absolutely fine with! I was sure some people weren’t particularly fond of hickies, but I absolutely loved them, especially when I was on the receiving end.   
  
“Mm, not…fair,” I whined, opening my eyes to look down at the fuzzy top of his head. “I’m naked and you’re still in your sweatpants.” Akira was always so focused on giving me pleasure that he sometimes forgot about himself. He was a very attentive lover~ That was for damn sure.   
  
He made a little noise of confusion, like he’d somehow forgotten that he was actually still wearing clothes. I rolled my eyes and sat myself up slightly, sliding my hand down to cup his hard cock through his sweats. There was a small wet patch there from his precome and I smirked as he groaned in surprise, hips slightly bucking into my hand.  
  
“Aw, big boy’s all neglected, huh?” I mused, teasing him slightly. Even when we got sexy like this I still managed to fit some teasing in. It wouldn’t be me if I didn’t. “C’mon then, don’t deny Akira Jr. anymore.” I looked up and winked at Akira, giving his cock (which was a pretty damn decent size too) a squeeze, making him grunt.   
  
“You’re such a smartarse,” he chuckled, no doubt rolling his eyes at me too. But he stood up off the couch for just a moment to slide his sweatpants off and toss them off with the rest of our clothes. He was back on me in just a moment and he wasted no time wrestling my legs, which offered no kind of resistance, apart. I moaned as he rubbed his cock up against mine and I could feel just how ready he was.   
  
“So hard,” I stated, biting my lip a little and rolling my hips up to meet his.  
  
“Just for you, baby,” he answered and I smiled. I hadn’t ever really mentioned it to him, and I was sure he didn’t need me to, but I absolutely loved that nickname. It was a common one and I knew it, but it just made me feel all nice and fuzzy.   
  
“Come on then, big boy,” I mused, grinning up at him, egging him on just a tad.   
  
A short trip to the bed room later and Akira was back, lube-coated fingers pumping inside of me over and over again. The bastard was purposely avoiding my spot too, just to tease me! That didn’t mean that I didn’t try to manipulate him though. I shifted my hips, grinding them down against the two fingers he had inside me in a bid to get him to even just nudge that spot.  
  
“So needy, Taka,” Akira said and I could hear the smug fucking grin in his voice, which made me huff and tip my head back just a little in exasperation.   
  
“Fuck you,” I answered, clenching around his fingers as my own fingers dug into his strong shoulders.   
  
“Oh no, baby. It’s me who’ll be fucking you very soon,” he said, leaning his head down to gently bit and pull at one of my nipples at the exact some time he located my prostate and pushed against it.   
  
“Ah!” I arched, scrunching up my face. “Oh fuck! You’re such a dick..”   
  
“Yeah, but you love it. And you love my dick too.”   
  
“Then what are you waiting for,” I retorted almost instantly, opening my eyes and tugging on his hair. “Fuck me already. I was ready for this yesterday.”   
  
Akira merely chuckled as he withdrew his fingers from me, making me feel that weird empty feeling that I never really liked. But he didn’t keep me waiting long before the warm tip of his lubed up cock was nudging against my entrance. We had given up using condoms a month or so ago after we’d both gotten tested and had come back totally clean. It felt so much better bare anyway!   
  
I waited with bated breath as he pressed his hips forward, slowly entering me and I keened, arching up against him. The initial breech was always the least pleasant of all of it, but once he was inside of me and I was used to it things got a million times better. Which it did then when he was fully seated inside of me and he began that slow, torturous roll of his hips that he liked to start with. He knew it drove me fucking crazy and that was exactly why he did it!  
  
“No, Aki,” I groaned, looking up at him, “Not tonight. Just…hard. Fuck me hard.” I was so beyond horny already that I just needed a quick orgasm. Besides, he had the rest of the weekend to fuck me as slowly as he wanted to.   
  
Luckily for me, he seemed to understand that I just needed this to be fast and rough because as soon as I finished he nodded, closing in to kiss me deeply as he his hips sped up, eventually reaching a nice fast pace. A pace that set my head spinning as I grabbed onto the back of the couch, my back slipping along it slightly. It became evident quickly enough that we couldn’t kiss like this, so his lips moved to my neck where he bit rather harshly, sucking on my large patch of skin.   
  
“Oh… Oh fuck, Aki..!” I cried as the head of his cock well and truly hit my prostate this time and I wrapped my thighs around his hips as he drove into that spot over and over again, making me cry out and arch against him every time. I loved it when he went hard like this, made me moan and keen his name. I loved him rough.   
  
He pulled back from me after a while, one hand reaching down to slide his hand beneath my knee and push it up so far that my thigh almost touched my chest. The action left me wide open, completely spread out for him as he began to thrust even harder than he had before. The only thing that soon filled the room was my rather loud, needy moans and Akira’s own throaty grunts and groans, which were such a turn on for me, and the slap of his slick skin against my own.   
  
His pace was impressive, but it was to be expected of someone who was as fit and active as him. His stamina was definitely impressive. The faster he went the more I lost my mind, gripping onto his biceps harder with every moment. “Oh…Oh! Ngh, Akira I’m…” I panted out, forcing my eyes open to look up at the fuzzy shape of him leaned over me. “I’m gonna…Oh god, you’re gonna m-make me come,” I heaved.  
  
His only response was to snap his hips up harder, hitting my prostate dead on every single time and it felt so unbelievably good that the corners of my shitty vision began to go black. I wasn’t sure if that’s what really happened, but that was what it felt like!   
  
“Come on, baby,” he growled as he leaned over me, laying into me over and over again. “Come for me, Taka. That’s it…”  
  
“Ah…ah, AH!” I practically screamed as my back arched off the bed and I came against my stomach. I hadn’t even needed him to touch me this time! It wasn’t too long after that when he followed me into bliss and his warm come emptying inside of me was possibly one of the dirtiest and most wonderful feelings in the world. I moaned quietly, biting my lip as he rode out his orgasm until I felt his cock begin to go soft.  
  
Pulling out, he pecked my lips before grasping a few tissues from the box on the coffee table to clean us up with. After that, he flopped down and pulled me atop him. We were both still panting, but we were happily sated. I smiled, leaning my head against him as I began to doze.   
  
“I’m gonna regret fucking you on the couch later,” he mused, hand absentmindedly rubbing over my shoulder and the touch calmed me and made me feel so safe. “That was certainly an effort and a half,” he chuckled.   
  
“Mm, but it was totally worth it,” I answered.   
  
A few hours later we dropped off to bed and it was while we were lying in bed, Akira’s nose buried into my hair as he bundled me up in his strong arms that he hummed quietly. “Hey Taka?”  
  
“Mm?”  
  
“Have…you ever thought about getting surgery?” He asked cautiously. And rightfully so. While I had no issue talking about my eyes it was sometimes a bit of a sore topic depending on what exactly we were talking about in regards to them. “Y’know, to fix your vision. They can do that.”   
  
I pursed my lips, pressing my nose against his collarbone as I hummed, staying quiet for just a few moments as I thought. “Look…” I started a good few moments of silence later. “Yeah, I have thought about it before. But, Aki… Surgeries like that don’t always work. This isn’t something that can be reversed and made better. I was born like this, I don’t have eyes that can be fixed because there’s nothing to reverse.” I shrugged my shoulders, feeling a little sulky now. Yuu had tried to talk to me about this multiple times before but most of the time I just ignored what he was saying or dismissed it. But I couldn’t very well do that with Akira.   
  
  
“Those sorts of surgeries are so expensive,” I continued, now having a small frown pulling at my brow. But not because I was annoyed at him. I was just annoyed in general. “They cost more than anything I could ever afford. Akira, I accepted a long, long time ago that I’ll always just be this way,” I said, almost murmuring now. “I’ll never see everything I want to see. I’ll never know what a real sunset looks like. I’ll never read a real book. I’ll never really see your face,” I whispered, letting my hand come up to rest against his cheek as my thumb slid across his closed eyelid. I did that a lot, and he always let me. Feeling him was something almost like seeing him.   
  
“But that’s ok,” I assured him, trying to sound reassuring. “I don’t need all of those things, especially when it comes to you. I don’t need my eyes to see you. Because I hear your voice and I see how special you are. I feel your touch and I see how kind you are.” I wasn’t normally one to get all mushy like that… but now that it started it kind of just kept flowing. “I see your heart, coz that’s what this is. It’s a matter of the heart, Aki. And that’s why I love you.”   
  
He was silent for a long time and I wondered if maybe I had spoken too soon. It had been six months, sure… but was it too soon to say the ‘L’ word? He was silent for so long I was beginning to think that maybe I had royally fucked up! But then he let out a small breathy chuckle and his nose pressed into my hair. He sniffled too.   
  
“Aki… Are you-”  
  
“Shut up,” he cut me off. But it was obvious, he was crying. “Happy tears, babe,” he assured me, running his fingers through my hair. “God, you’re so fucking perfect,” he chuckled, sniffling again.   
  
“Fucking softie,” I grinned, nudging him. I couldn’t believe I’d made him tear up!!   
  
“I love you too, Taka.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo I know it's been more than a week Dx I'm so sorry guys, but here is the next chapter! I'm almost done writing the 5th and final chapter so hopefully I can get that up for you soon. Life has just gotten on top of the me the last few weeks between uni and work and trying to maintain some kind of social life. It's been busy~
> 
> Anyway, I hope you're all well. Enjoy this chapter ^_^


	5. I See You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks as always to my beta KaiButsu13

Taka, are you sure you’re ready to do this?”  
  
“Yeah… I am,” I said, biting my lip anxiously as I glanced about the room, taking in everything it held, everything it meant for both mine and Akira’s future. It was a scary idea, doing this, and it had taken a long time to decide. It had been a lot of back and forth conversation, even a few arguments. We’d had to bring Yuu into it, of course, because he was such a huge part of my life that there was absolutely no way we could exclude him from such a big decision.   
  
“Good,” Akira said, nudging me and grinning. “Because there’s absolutely no way I’m packing and unpacking all of these boxes again, and I think the same goes for Yuu.”   
  
“Yes!” I heard my best friend shout from the bathroom where he was showering after a very, very long, sweaty day of moving boxes and some furniture as well. “I agree!”  
  
Akira chuckled, walking over to me and sliding his arm around my shoulders, kissing my temple. I sighed, leaning into his side. I wish I could see the room… I wished I could see my things mixed with Akira’s things. Things that we’d bought together that were now ours. I wished I could see our home. But Akira told me that it looked perfect, and that was more than enough for me.   
  
Akira and I had started talking about moving in together around a year after we’d gotten together. It was a very big decision for us, probably more than any other couple. Actually, definitely bigger than most other couples. For obvious reasons, I’m sure. It was also a scary thing for me, because for as long as I could remember Yuu had been my roommate and my caregiver. He always looked after me, he always went to my doctor’s appointments with me, he always helped me pick my clothes, he always put my contact lenses in, and so much more.   
  
Moving in with Akira meant handing over those responsibilities to him. I’d been cautious at first, of course. It was such a huge decision and I’d always been weird about people trying to take care of me. Yuu had always done it and that was why I’d never had much of a problem with him doing it. But to ask Akira to take on all of those things seemed impossible and I hated to feel like I would become a burden on him. But he had assured me over and over again that he wanted to; that it was only a small part of this big picture called ‘us’.   
  
So with much convincing from Akira and a long time talking to Yuu they had both finally convinced me to do it. Not to mention Yuu and Mimiko were finally engaged! My moving out meant that Yuu and her could get their own place, they could start planning their wedding after so many years! I felt like I’d done something good for my best friend. I could finally pay him back for all the years he took care of me.   
  
“Taka,” Akira nudged me again and I shook my head a little, humming. “I love you.”   
  
I raised an eyebrow at him and shook my head. “Shut up, you dork. Stop getting all mushy on me.”   
  
“That means he loves you too,” Yuu piped up from behind us, clapping me on the shoulder as he went to flop onto the couch, rubbing a towel through his wet hair. He and Akira had become really good friends as well, which was a relief. I didn’t know what I would have done if Akira and Yuu had somehow ended up hating each other. But then, I didn’t really think Akira had the capacity to actually hate anyone. Yuu definitely could though, I knew that much.  
  
“Don’t you have a wedding to go plan?” I asked, wandering over to him and aiming my foot at his shin for a soft kick which I missed, of course, earning myself an amused snort from my friend. “Seriously, though. Weren’t you and Mimiko supposed to go and pick flowers today or something?”   
  
“Fuck!” Yuu shot up off the couch, dropping the towel to the floor before scrambling about to get his keys and his wallet. “You coulda told me earlier, you dick!”   
  
I rolled my eyes at him, moving over to take his spot on the couch and flashing a grin at Akira. Who I was sure was probably shaking his head and also rolling his eyes. Yuu was running around like an idiot before he finally calmed down enough to give me a quick hug, shake Akira’s hand, do that weird little man-hug thing and then he was off.   
  
“Make sure you fuck him on every available surface!” Yuu called just before he popped out the door, leaving Akira and I to our own devices.  
  
“Well, you heard the man,” Akira chirped, walking straight up to me to pick me up.   
  
“Oi!” I shouted, laughing as Akira carried me over to the dining table, placing me down on top of the surface as he leaned over me. “Akira! Aki…nmm.” He planted his lips right on mine, kissing me deeply.   
  
We definitely listened to Yuu. Over the following week we screwed pretty much everywhere. We fucked against the kitchen counter, on the dining table, over the back of the couch, in the shower, in the bath and even against the wall in the hallway. It was the good life! And I didn’t think I had been so happy in my entire life.   
  
*          *          *  
  
“Akira, we have mail,” I said, wandering into the living room holding a few envelopes for him to take as I sat down on the couch beside him, leaning back and sliding my legs over his lap. “Is there anything for me there?” I asked, biting my lip a little anxiously.   
  
“Um…” he hummed, picking up my hand and holding it as he flipped through letters in his lap with the other. “Bills, bills, junk mail, more bills. There’s something here from the phone company. And…huh?”   
  
I knew from the tone of his voice that he was frowning and I sat up a little more, aiming my attention at him fully. “What is it?” I asked, feigning obliviousness.   
  
“It’s from your doctor. But you haven’t been recently…have you?” He questioned, turning to look at me. My response was to merely shrug my shoulders and nod towards the envelope.   
  
“Open it,” I prompted. I was fairly sure I knew what it was… I just hoped he wouldn’t freak out too much, or in a bad way.   
  
I watched him begin to work on opening up the envelope and he pulled out a few pieces of paper. “Dear Matsumoto-san,” he started, reading my letter aloud. “Thank you for your consultation last month, I’ve been over all of your options as well as your medical history and it appears that you’re in perfect health and you are fully able to undergo…sur…gery…” Akira lowered the papers and looked towards me once again. I shook my head at him, indicating that I wasn’t going to answer his questions yet. Waving my hand at the paper, I urged him to go on. “Laser eye surgery is the best option for you and we will be able to restore your eyesight to full clarity at best, though you may need to wear glasses in the worst case. Inside is all the paperwork you’ll need to fill out and email back to the clinic, after that it should only be a week before I get back to you and we can set a date for the surgery. Regards, Doctor Uke Yutaka.”   
  
I watched Akira drop his hands into his lap and he let out a huff of breath. It was obvious that he was shocked. I just wasn’t sure if it was good shocked… or bad shocked. I sincerely hoped that it was good shocked!   
  
“Say something, Aki.” I was actually starting to get kinda worried about his silence. My heart was thumping hard in my chest and my hands were sweaty as fuck. “Are you mad?”   
  
“You went for a consultation without me,” he finally said and I could feel my heart kind of drop. “Why didn’t you tell me?”  
  
“I went with Yuu,” I informed him, wringing my hands in my lap nervously. “I wanted it to be a surprise. Aki…I can fix my eyes. I’ll be able to see things for real, for the first time ever. I’ll be able to see you and our home. You won’t need to put contact lenses in for me or pick out my clothes for me. You won’t have to do anything like that.” I thought maybe selling the idea to him a little more might convince him that it was the right thing for me to do.   
  
“So you’re doing this for my sake?” He questioned, turning to look at me fully now and I didn’t need to see the details of his face to know that he wasn’t happy.   
  
“Well…I…”   
  
“No,” he stated, shaking his head. “Takanori, I don’t want you to go and spend all this money on surgery if it’s just to please me. If it’s just to make you feel like you’ll be less of a burden on me.” He sighed, putting his hand on my shin and rubbing it gently. “If you do this I want you to do it for you. I’ll love you no matter what.”  
  
God, I was so relieved I could have started crying. I let out a loud sigh of relief and sat up, managing to aim well enough to punch him in the arm. “You fucker! You scared the shit out of me,” I scolded him, punching him once more just to get my point across. “I thought you were really fucking mad at me!” I groaned, flopping backwards against the couch. Now my heart was beating for a whole new reason.  
  
Akira laughed, rubbing his arm. “Idiot, I’m not mad at you. If this is what will make you happy then go ahead,” he assured me. “Taka, sit up.” I hauled myself up and he took my hands, holding them tightly. “I will support you with anything you want to do… within reason,” he chuckled, squeezing my hands with a little chuckle. “But if you want to go and get this surgery then I will be right there with you.”   
  
I smiled, shaking my head at him slightly. “You’re such a sappy fucker.”   
  
Akira chuckled. “Yeah, but you like it.”   
  
“I do.”  
  
*          *          *  
  
“Alright, Matsumoto-san,” Dr. Uke said as he leaned over me where I lay in the preparation room. “All ready to go?” He was already wearing his mask and his white coat, ready to begin the procedure. The only addition he needed was his gloves and surgical tools.  
  
“Yeah,” I nodded. Turning to Akira, I squeezed his hand and smiled.   
  
“Alright, I’ll see you soon,” he smiled before stepping out and shutting the door behind himself, leaving Akira and I in there alone.   
  
“You ok, baby?” Akira asked me, sitting down on the edge of the bed with me. He leaned over, kissing my forehead before stroking my hair away from my face.   
  
“Yeah, I’m alright. Just kinda nervous. When I wake up I’ll actually see you for the first time,” I chuckled, though it was kinda shaky. I wasn’t really one to get overly emotional all that often. But this was a big thing! I was about to really see the world for the first time and of course that made me a little emotional!   
  
Akira chuckled, rubbing my arm gently. “Hopefully after you see my handsome face you won’t end up just like the others,” he joked, though there was an air of true worry in his voice that I picked up on pretty easily.   
  
“Idiot,” I sniffled, shaking my head at him. “I didn’t fall in love with you for what you look like. I fell in love with you for who you are.”   
  
“Now who’s the one getting all sappy?” He teased again, pecking my cheek. He knew I hated it when he got all mushy and sappy on me, so of course he would take the opportunity to throw it back in my face. But I couldn’t deny that he was telling the truth, and besides, it was a rare opportunity he’d get; teasing me about being sappy.  
  
“Don’t get used to it.” I slid my hand up, curling it around the back of his neck to pull him down for a kiss. We stayed like that for a few moments before there was a light knock on the door once more. I knew who it was before they even called through the door. “I’m ready,” I said to the nurse as she excused herself and entered. I smiled at Akira again as he got up off my bed.   
  
“Alright Mr. Matsumoto,” the nurse said kindly, rubbing my shoulder gently. “I’m going to put the mask on you now, you’ll start to feel woozy but that’s normal. Just let it happen, ok?”   
  
I merely nodded as he put the mask on my face. I took a few deep breathes, taking in the gas that felt like nothing but gentle airflow. I knew better though. I’d be out cold in a few minutes. I smiled back up at Akira who chuckled and rubbed his hand through my hair. “I’ll see you on the other side, baby,” he mused, pun clearly intended.   
  
“Idiot,” I mumbled sleepily as a few nurses wheeled my bed out of the preparation room and towards the surgery room. I didn’t really remember anything beyond the passing of fluorescent lights above my head before my body began to feel heavy and more tired than it ever had. I didn’t even remember the exact moment that it happened, but eventually everything went black and I was out cold.   
  
*          *          *  
  
Waking up after surgery was uncomfortable. That was something I figured out very, very quickly. My limbs felt like lead, my breathing was still a little laboured and I just felt… dopey. I also couldn’t see out of either of my eyes. But a quick reassuring voice, probably a nurse, informed me that I had bandages over my eyes for the healing process. She also told me that it would be a few days before I’d be able to take them off. They needed me not to move my eyes at all and being in complete darkness would achieve that, as there was nothing for my eyes to focus on. Hence they remained still.   
  
The second thing I noticed was the hand that covered mine. My fingers closed around the appendage and I turned my head in that general direction. “Aki?” I murmured, voice hoarse like I hadn’t used it in months. Though I was sure it was just the anaesthetic wearing off.   
  
“Yeah, baby,” he answered, squeezing my hand back. “It’s me.” I let out a little sigh of relief. It felt good to know that he was there with me. He filled me in on everything, told me how long I’d been in surgery for. He told me Dr. Uke said everything went well and my eyesight should be fully functional, though we wouldn’t completely know for sure until the “big reveal”, as Dr. Uke called it, happened. Until then I would just have to wait in darkness, biting my nails nervously.  
  
*          *          *  
  
Akira held my hand as he sat beside me in my room; I was still in the bed I’d been in for the past few days, Akira sat in the chair beside me. Dr. Uke was standing beside my bed. At least, I think he was there. I still had those bandages over my eyes. But today they would finally come off.   
  
“Ok, Mr. Matsumoto,” said Dr. Uke as I felt his hands reach for the bandage that was secured at the back of my head. “I’ll just get you to keep your eyes closed until we get all the bandaging and gauze off and I’ve cleaned any yuckiness off your eyes.” He worked as he spoke, gently pulling away the bandage and removing the gauze over my eyes. I could already see how much brighter it was through my eyelids. It was a little startling, to be honest. “When you do open your eyes, I want you to do it slowly, ok? They might be a little sensitive since they aren’t used to taking in so much light and colour. You need to let them adjust.” I hummed, flinching slightly as the wetness of a damp cloth touched my eyelid. I assumed it had some kind of chemical on it to help clean my eyes.   
  
Dr. Uke finished up what he was doing and stepped back. “Alright, Mr. Matsumoto. You can slowly open your eyes now.”   
  
I could feel Akira squeeze my hand and I swallowed thickly. For some reason I was nervous. Really, really nervous. I was about to see the world for the first time! At the age of twenty-two. I would see my boyfriend’s face for the first time since I’d met him. I’d get home and be able to see the space we lived in. I’d be able to see my best friend’s face, my parent’s faces. My own face! I was terrified.   
  
I was sure my hands were shaking, but Akira just kept holding them, gently rubbing his thumbs over my knuckles; offering his silent encouragement. Slowly I parted my eyelids, blinking the blariness away carefully and letting my eyes adjust little by little. Dr. Uke had been right. The light was really quite intense, so it took a few minutes for me to fully be able to open my eyes and when I did I could do nothing but let my jaw drop. In front of me was a hospital room along with a smiling doctor. I could see the name on his lab coat, I could see the little pendant around his neck, I could see his dimples.   
  
Looking around the room, I could see the clock on the wall. I could see what was playing on the TV. It was like… it was like someone had come along and turned up the dial on the eyesight to super mega crazy HD. Taking everything in, I was almost scared to look to my right. I was almost scared to look at my own boyfriend!   
  
But I did it anyway.   
  
Swallowing thickly, I slowly turned my head. Akira came into view slowly and finally I stopped on his face. Tears sprang to my eyes instantly. God, he was so perfect. He had the most gorgeous deep brown eyes, his nose was the perfect shape, his lips looked exactly how they had always felt against mine; plush and soft but not too big. His jaw was just the right angle. Moving further down, his body was even more amazing than I ever would have thought. He was slender and I could practically see his lean muscles through that shirt he was wearing.   
  
My eyes wandered back up to his face to find that he was tearing up as well. That’s when my own waterworks really started. With a sob, I clasped my hands over my mouth in disbelief. I couldn’t believe it! I could really see. It was like my wildest dreams had come true and I couldn’t even contain myself anymore.   
  
Akira got up and sat himself down on my bed, sliding his arm around my waist and pulling me into him. “Hey,” he soothed, running his fingers through my hair. And, god, even his hands were perfect! It was like he was crafted by the Gods! “Don’t cry, you silly thing.”   
  
“Y-you’re crying to-too!” I protested, but laughed through the tears nonetheless. Shaking my head, I pressed my nose against his neck. It was a bit of a struggle to fight through the sobs enough to be able to talk. But I got there. “I’m crying be-because I’m-m ha-happy,” I sobbed, fingers twisted tightly into his shirt. I was so happy; more happy than I had ever been in my entire life!   
  
Akira pulled back, cupping my cheeks and swiping my tears away with his thumbs. “Is it everything you hoped for?”  
  
“Stupid question, dumbass,” I grumbled, curling my fingers around his wrists. I could hear Dr. Uke chuckle in the background, but I hardly noticed he was there. I let go of his wrists and cupped his face, running my thumbs over his cheeks. Finally, I could feel him and see him. I was just... in awe of him. He was utterly the most gorgeous man I had ever laid eyes one. Or... well... kind of. He was just more gorgeous than I could have ever imagined! “Of course it is! I really scored myself a looker.”   
  
Akira tilted his head back and laughed loudly. “You’re a dork.”  
  
“But you love me,” I grinned.   
  
“I do. I really do,” Akira agreed, smiling at me fondly before he leaned down and sealed it with a kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's oveeer~ Ah, I really enjoyed writing this little gem ^^ Hopefully you guys enjoyed it as well! I'm thinking now that I really want to go back and look at my two other multi-chapters that I haven't touched for years. I have half a chapter written for one, but it's bothering me that they're just sitting there unfinished. So that's my next mission~ ^^

**Author's Note:**

> So! This is a fic I've had in the works since the beginning of the year. I really wanted to pretty much finish it before I posted anything because I didn't want to keep anyone waiting for a stupid amount of time, which I seem to do pretty often. Woops~
> 
> So yes~ I have 4 out of the 5 chapter completely written. I'm just waiting on 3 and 4 to be beta-ed and I'm going to start writing chapter 5 this weekend. I'll probably upload a chapter a week, unless I'm begged for more xD Then I miiight reconsider. I also wonder is anyone will catch on to what's going on already. let me know in the comments what your theories are! ;)
> 
> Anyway, my loves, I hope you enjoyed this! And look forward to more soon ^3^


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